


The Nothing

by romeoandjulietyouwish



Series: Lis Writes 9-1-1 [28]
Category: 9-1-1: Lone Star (TV 2020)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Father-Son Relationship, Gen, Good Dad Owen Strand, Hurt TK Strand, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Owen Strand is a Good Dad, Protective Owen Strand, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, TK Strand Needs A Hug, Whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-06
Updated: 2020-07-06
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:06:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25099621
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/romeoandjulietyouwish/pseuds/romeoandjulietyouwish
Summary: TK shows up at Owen's apartment in the middle of the night on a Thursday.
Relationships: Owen Strand & TK Strand
Series: Lis Writes 9-1-1 [28]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1725208
Comments: 11
Kudos: 161





	The Nothing

**Author's Note:**

> TW: suicidal thoughts, mentions of attempted suicide, implied self harm

Owen’s phone rings in the middle of the night on a Thursday. It’s TK. Owen is so tired from his shift that he nearly missed it. But he didn’t. Thank God. 

“TK?” Owen askes groggily, clicking on his bedside light. “What’s going on?” 

“Dad?” TK’s voice is shaky. “I-I’m outside, can I please-please come in?” It sounds like TK is crying or very close to it. The sound of his child upset has Owen wide awake in seconds. 

Owen jumps out of bed, moving towards the door, “Of course. Do you have your key?” 

“No.” 

“That’s okay,” Owen assures him. “I’m going to come down and get you, okay?” He knows he could very easily buzz TK in and wait for him to walk up the stairs, but that doesn’t feel right. Owen doesn’t like waiting. “Don’t hang up until you see me.”

“O-Okay.” TK sniffs. 

“Are you hurt?” Owen asks, not even putting on shoes as he rushes down the stairs of his apartment building. 

“I don’t think so.” The wording doesn’t soothe Owen in the slightest. 

“Did you take anything?”

“No.” TK’s response is quick enough that Owen doesn’t think he’s lying. 

“That’s good, buddy,” Owen tells his son as he pushes open the door. Normally TK would protest pet names, tell his dad he’s too old for those kinds of things. But this time he doesn’t.

TK lowers the phone from his ear as he sees his dad. His cheeks are streaked with tears and he doesn’t look like he’s slept in days. What the hell is going on? Owen saw him yesterday. What changed? Maybe he wasn’t paying enough attention to how he was really doing. 

“Dad,” TK shoves himself into Owen’s arms, pressing his nose to his dad’s pulse point. 

Owen holds him just as tight, one hand in TK’s hair, as he lets him sob into his chest. He runs his fingers through TK’s hair. “We’re okay, Tyler. It’s alright.” Owen moves them back and forth a little before he says. “Why don’t we go inside, huh?” 

“Okay.” TK pulls himself out of Owen’s arms, quickly mopping up his tears with the sleeve of his sweatshirt. Owen keeps his arm around TK the whole way up to the apartment. 

Once they’re inside, Owen sits TK down on the couch and wraps a blanket around his shoulders. He runs his thumb over TK’s knuckles and asks, “Do you want to tell me what’s going on?” 

TK looks up at Owen through his lashes, pressing his shaking hands against his legs. He takes a deep breath. “I-I was scared I was going to hurt myself.” Owen’s heart stills in his chest; those words terrify him more than anything. His son hurts so deeply that he thought he would try to hurt himself. “I-I was on the roof.” 

Owen takes TK’s hands, looking at his son with more intensity than ever before, “Were you going to jump?” 

TK’s lip trembles, fresh tears pouring down his cheeks and he nods. Owen yanks TK into his arms, holding him as tight as he can. TK trembles in his grasp as his sobs into his father’s chest. Owen fights back his own tears. His son wants to die. His child has so much pain in his heart that he wants to end his own life. 

He knew TK was dealing with depression, but he has no idea it was this bad. His son could have died tonight and Owen would have had no idea why.

“Shh,” Owen soothes as he tightens his grip on TK. “You’re going to be okay, baby. I got you.” 

“Dad,” TK sobs out the word, “I-I’m so scared.” Owen knows what he doesn’t say is that he’s scared of himself.

“I know,” Owen pulls back and takes TK’s face between his hands. “But it’s going to be okay.”

TK shakes his head, “How do you know?” 

“Because you are Tyler Kennedy Strand,” Owen uses his thumb to wipe away TK’s tears. “And you have one stubborn as hell dad who will not let you go. We’re going to make it through this together.” 

A ghost of a smile crosses TK’s face, “You promise?” 

“I promise.” 

TK falls back into Owen’s arms. Owen holds TK for as long as he can, running hands up and down TK’s back. Eventually, TK cries himself into a fitful sleep and Owen doesn’t have the strength to move away from his son. TK wakes up in the morning with his head in his dad’s lap, Owen fast asleep sitting up. 

“Did you want to kill yourself?” 

Owen asks his son only three years later after TK OD’d in his apartment. The pause before TK tells him no is all Owen needs to make the decision to move to Austin. If he doesn’t do something now, he knows he will lose his son. He’s gotten so close to losing him, he’s not willing to risk it again.

He thought TK would fight more the stay in New York, but he didn't. He lets himself be dragged to the other side of the country. That scares Owen more. TK once describes this thing inside his head to Owen. He said it was like The Nothing from one of his favorite childhood movies The Never Ending Story, an unseen, unstoppable force, that makes everything in its path become...nothing. 

The morning after TK showed up at Owen’s apartment, he said that The Nothing filled his brain and that it made him feel so much and so little at the same time. He was in pain, but he was numb to it. 

Now, almost a year after moving to Texas, Owen feels his heart swell with pride. TK is okay, TK has more people he can trust and rely on, he has so much light and happiness in his life. Owen cried the day TK told him that The Nothing had settled, not gone, but gone dormant in his mind. 

His son is okay.

Owen can finally let out a breath of relief. 

**Author's Note:**

> Stay safe you guys <3
> 
> Comments and kudos are always appreciated!
> 
> Tumblr- @evanbuckley-heartofgold


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